Feeling right at the bottom...

Perhaps I have enjoyed and splurged too much even though I constantly remind myself not to spend unnecessarily. I did so in an effort to prevent myself from going thru the difficult and unhappy times I once went thru. However, being poor (momentarily) in the present will always be a fact regardless how capable one could 'avoid' this fact. When this fact hits upon self 200% consciously, one's feelings will be hit upon strongly and feelings down it goes.

And because of this fact, I realised I'm still afraid upon the 'unforseeable' future because of a big obstacle. How can I overcome this hurdle? It is time I ought to wake up because there's no way I can stay the way I used to, nor continue being weak. I may be scared but there's no time for me to carry on pondering. Instead, take concrete actions is the solution. Now, it is I myself should run my own life despite how willing parents are. Let them withness how I become independent is the utmost thing to do currently.